Living with Intention Building Meaningful Relationships in Life
Image Source: bing.comBreaking up with a narcissist can be a traumatic experience, leaving the victim feeling emotionally drained, confused, and hurt. Narcissists are known for their manipulative and self-centered behavior, and this extends to how they treat their exes. Here’s a look at how narcissists treat their exes.
1. They Refuse to Accept Responsibility
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists are notoriously unwilling to accept responsibility for their actions, and this extends to their behavior in relationships. When a narcissist’s relationship ends, they are unlikely to acknowledge their role in the breakup and may even blame their ex for the failure of the relationship.
2. They Try to Control the Narrative
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists are masters of manipulation and will often try to control the narrative surrounding the breakup. They may spread lies about their ex or try to paint themselves as the victim in the relationship. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist look good and their ex look bad.
3. They Use Gaslighting
Image Source: bing.comGaslighting is a tactic used by narcissists to make their victims doubt their own reality. Narcissists may use gaslighting to make their ex feel like they are crazy or to make them doubt the validity of their emotions. This can be a particularly damaging form of emotional abuse.
4. They Hoover
Image Source: bing.comHoovering is a term used to describe the behavior of a narcissist who tries to re-enter their ex’s life after a breakup. This behavior is designed to keep the narcissist in control and to make their ex feel like they can’t move on. Hoovering can be particularly damaging for victims of narcissistic abuse.
5. They Seek Revenge
Narcissists may seek revenge on their exes if they feel like they have been wronged. This can take many forms, from spreading rumors to outright stalking. Narcissists may also try to damage their ex’s reputation or career as a form of revenge.
6. They Use Their Children as Pawns
Image Source: bing.comIf a narcissist has children with their ex, they may use them as pawns to manipulate and control their ex. This can take many forms, from withholding visitation to bad-mouthing the ex to the children. Narcissists may also try to turn the children against their ex as a way of gaining control.
7. They Refuse to Let Go
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may refuse to let go of their ex even after the relationship has ended. They may continue to call, text, or email their ex in an attempt to maintain control over them. This behavior can be particularly damaging for victims of narcissistic abuse, who may feel like they can’t escape their ex’s influence.
8. They Use Flying Monkeys
Image Source: bing.comFlying monkeys are people who do the bidding of a narcissist without realizing that they are being used. Narcissists may use flying monkeys to harass or intimidate their ex, or to spread lies about them. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist look good and their ex look bad.
9. They Expect Their Ex to Be Perfect
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists have very high expectations of their partners and may expect them to be perfect. When a relationship ends, the narcissist may blame their ex for not meeting their unrealistic expectations. This can be particularly damaging for victims of narcissistic abuse, who may feel like they can never measure up.
10. They Project Their Own Flaws onto Their Ex
Narcissists may project their own flaws onto their ex in an attempt to deflect blame. For example, if a narcissist is unfaithful, they may accuse their ex of cheating. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist look good and their ex look bad.
11. They Play the Victim
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may play the victim in an attempt to gain sympathy or to deflect blame. For example, a narcissist who has been caught cheating may claim that their ex was emotionally abusive, in an attempt to justify their own behavior. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist look good and their ex look bad.
12. They Devalue Their Ex
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may devalue their ex in an attempt to make themselves feel better. They may call their ex names, criticize their appearance or intelligence, or belittle their accomplishments. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel superior and to make their ex feel inferior.
13. They Withhold Closure
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may withhold closure from their ex in an attempt to maintain control. They may refuse to answer questions or provide explanations for their behavior, leaving their ex feeling confused and hurt. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
14. They Use Love Bombing
Image Source: bing.comLove bombing is a tactic used by narcissists to shower their partner with affection and attention. After a breakup, a narcissist may use love bombing to try to win their ex back. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
15. They Use Silent Treatment
Image Source: bing.comThe silent treatment is a tactic used by narcissists to punish their partner. After a breakup, a narcissist may use the silent treatment to try to get their ex to come back to them. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
16. They May Try to Get Back Together
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to get back together with their ex after a breakup. This behavior is designed to maintain control over their ex and to prevent them from moving on. If their ex refuses to get back together, the narcissist may resort to other tactics, such as hoovering or revenge.
17. They May Threaten Their Ex
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may threaten their ex if they feel like they are losing control. This can take many forms, from verbal threats to physical violence. If you feel like you are in danger, it is important to seek help immediately.
18. They May Try to Isolate Their Ex
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to isolate their ex from their friends and family in an attempt to maintain control. They may spread lies about their ex or try to turn their loved ones against them. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
19. They May Stalk Their Ex
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may stalk their ex if they feel like they are losing control. They may follow their ex, show up unannounced at their home or workplace, or monitor their social media accounts. If you feel like you are being stalked, it is important to seek help immediately.
20. They May Try to Make Their Ex Jealous
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to make their ex jealous by flaunting their new relationships or accomplishments. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control, and to make their ex feel inferior.
21. They May Try to Sabotage Their Ex’s New Relationships
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to sabotage their ex’s new relationships in an attempt to maintain control. They may spread lies about their ex or try to turn their new partner against them. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
22. They May Try to Ruin Their Ex’s Reputation
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to ruin their ex’s reputation in an attempt to maintain control. They may spread lies or rumors about their ex or try to damage their professional or personal reputation. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
23. They May Try to Control Their Ex’s Finances
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to control their ex’s finances in an attempt to maintain control. They may refuse to pay child support or alimony, or try to manipulate their ex into giving them money. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
24. They May Use Their Ex’s Vulnerabilities Against Them
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may use their ex’s vulnerabilities against them in an attempt to maintain control. For example, if their ex has a fear of abandonment, the narcissist may threaten to leave them if they don’t comply with their demands. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
25. They May Try to Make Their Ex Dependent on Them
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to make their ex dependent on them in an attempt to maintain control. They may withhold financial support or emotional validation in order to keep their ex reliant on them. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
26. They May Try to Make Their Ex Feel Guilty
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to make their ex feel guilty in an attempt to maintain control. They may use emotional manipulation or gaslighting to make their ex feel like they are to blame for the breakup. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
27. They May Try to Make Their Ex Feel Crazy
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to make their ex feel crazy in an attempt to maintain control. They may use gaslighting or other forms of emotional manipulation to make their ex doubt their own reality. This behavior is designed to make the narcissist feel powerful and in control.
28. They May Try to Make Their Ex Feel Sorry for Them
Image Source: bing.comNarcissists may try to make their ex feel sorry for them in an attempt to maintain control. They may play the victim or use emotional manipulation to make their ex feel like they need to take care of them. This behavior is designed to make
